Talk:The Poisoned Water/@comment-3538016-20131229150411

Some constructive criticism:

This story is very confusing. The action is too fast-paced, leaving the readers unsure of where they are. The dialogue is not nearly sufficient enough to guide the readers through the plotline. The plotline itself reads as if your primary concern was not with telling an enjoyable story, but with making dramatic reveals.

At the end, for example, you have not described the scene in a satisfactory manner at all. They seem to have teleported, according to the sparse dialogue--but where to? The ship, the beach... does it even matter? And then you have the Doctor tackling a Sea Devil through a window. This makes no sense. If it was meant to be shocking, then it worked, but even the most shocking of scenes ought to have some build-up or explanation.

With so much action and so little exposition, it's nigh impossible to read this story. I would recommend you spend a little time studying stories that you liked. Look at anything by Shakespeare to see a good example of how dialogue and stage directions ideally work together to tell a good story. Look at other fanfics on this site to see good prose written with a Doctor Who feel! Just remember that learning to write is a continual struggle upwards. I've been writing and studying writing for years and all my fanfiction is still garbage. I've been trying in vain to get people to post detailed criticisms of my writing. :)

In short, it's good to have you on the wiki, and I look forward to seeing future stories from you. Your work is not perfect, but neither is anyone else's. I urge you to talk to the greater community and see if you can't learn some tools of writing. :)